Dear Pimintel

The sky is confined by the clouds

 As I am confined by her love

I know as a Soldier I stand proud

But as a lover, my shoulders are shrugged


We are art, and our art breeds struggles and struggles

 It’s fabricating work that doesn’t belong to a couple


These colors are no longer fulfilling
Shades of bickering and miss-behaving

A love painted to enter willingly

Is now enslaving and betraying 

Yes, our love crafted this art

It’s a picture we both drew 

The painting started familiar in our hearts

But ended very unfamiliar from our view

 as all art is beautiful…
As all art is love, strength and pain

But I’m sorry my beautiful

My love for our art has changed….

 

roomate vs soulmate

It was friday when I recieved a text message from my girlfriend asking me about thoughts of moving in. I could only think to myself, wow I would love too but feel the urgency that maybe I should hold out on this beautiful offer or thought because it's a big decision. So I responded that "I'm still learning more about you, etc, etc, etc".


The following week on a Wend, my girlfriend brings up this same conversation and asked me to explain myself again. So I explain that I would rather hold of the offer because its a big commitment and that i'm still learning about her. Sooo my Love tells me that maybe I shouldnt stay over as much since I am not moving in...


The reason I didnt want to move in with you is because I enjoy being your soulmate; I don't want this to change because I'm your roomate. 

CAPTAIN AMERICA

There's always that signifying moment that' changes everything you've currently known-- i choose to remeber my moment by standing in front of my house holding a Captain America shield as she drove away..thinking this shield can't protect me from myself...

love is ?

My Public Frontal Lobe

 

A!''3

She's Everywhere

SHE’S EVERYWHERE

I see you everywhere

You’re the shooting stars that fly’s

You’re the bursting fireworks in the air

You’re the beautiful blue in the sky

You’re the R that is important in care

I see you everywhere,

You’re the color in my black and white life

Your sweetness in my tea

You’re my lover full of American spice

You’re that neatness in me

I see you everywhere

You’re the new page that I have written

You’re the good memories I believe

You’re a world I want to live in

You’re a world I’ve always dreamed

I see you everywhere

You’re my love

You’re my boo

Your everything-more then enough

You’re a love that is true….

A love I take with me everywhere…

my last blog ( < # 3 )

C'woman' I have the highest respect for you...

Take Care- Much Love...

excited for the rest of my life.....

...............Il let you know how it was when I get there.......

Value? Safes? Vaults? (encrypted for a reason)

That song...and that place....

I was going somewhere with these feelings earlier today, just don’t know where. Maybe it was just the song that was playing in the background that caused me to change my mood all of the sudden…. What was I thinking when this song came on? I was thinking to myself I wonder how she’s doing and in that thought I was also thinking ‘thinking about her isn’t so painful anymore,’ which go’s to show that I am emotionally detaching. This does not mean I do not care for her (I care for everyone), it just means to myself that I do not care to be with her anymore. -Liberated from a past love-

letter to You

Letter to you....

You don't have to be alone...

call me and I'll answer my moon phone..

and grab a ladder and climb to you in the skies

where you belong--up up very very highyour

alone cuz you hang by mars-

your alone cuz only few are stars--
you shine high night and day

you may be alone but at least your light keeps us safe

you are lonely because you are unique

I mean I've never seen anyone like this Irene
(:thats a good thing:)

So Miss(?) the Lonely Star-

-I'm the moon whom lives very far--

I revolve around every's life

and I only shine if the day is night-

Sometimes things can get lonely for me too

who knows, maybe I can be lonely with you

Pearl Ocean love

It’s all high ocean waves from here…

The moment I say goodbye…

 Makes way for a new cheer

At this moment I own my surprise…

Done without fondness

Or permissive drugs

I’m being honest

There’s no miss-shift love

Just a goodbye with a friendly wave...and yes, it't the same wave that took me away..

Rebounds Vs Han Solo

Life in general has been really off the wall crazy for me. To get into a deeper perceptive of my craziness- losing 35 lbs in five months and finally being able to see what little four pack I have. This year has been really life changing for me too for many reasons; one- I've finally decided what my career of choice is ( no matter what the expenses are), two I walked away from a 3 yr relationship that was on and off (this was 4 months ago), and finally because of my number two reason my number three reason is I don't feel like I can get into another relationship anytime soon. I almost feel like I would be doing it to conquer any anguish or guilty feelings I have. I think I should suffer a little more and continue to suffer until that suffering dissipates on its own. Lately, that feeling has been going away and I’m feeling confident that no matter what- I won’t need a rebound. I can really do this on my own. And I know they say “it takes one love to get over another”- but I think that’s just a desperate move and a short cut to fight what it is your really feeling. & What about having ethics? Would this be fair to your new partner? To date someone because your not strong enough to move forward on your own? I mean to find interest in that person because you feel it’s the only way to get over your past lover? Not for this guy; in pursuit of happiness by my means- myself :).

***Best Therapy****

David Guetta feat. Kid Cudi - Memories (Johnny Labs Lost Memories Mix) by JohnnyLabs

No Iphone/Facebook

 April 11, 2011

It's been very different not having to check my Facebook inbox or text message my friends lately. All of my friends think I'm getting carried away with the idea of reframing from using my I-Phone (locked in my desk) or the idea of not logging into Facebook for these next few days (possibly weeks)...IDK...Most of my friends make excellent points such as the following: they can't contact/ connect with me because my I-Phone is off and it goes straight to my voicemail, my boss won't be able to get a hold of me for any extra shifts, & what if I have an emergency? All stylistic variants for "no communication". My response to their comments is yes, I’ll miss texting you & talking to you over the phone. And yes, I’ll miss all the access I have from the single touch of my finger but there are other treasures in my life that triumph this new ecosystem of electronics & networking that I have centered myself in. I'm talking about the simple things that I have overlooked for years- like reading a book and then falling asleep to this book at the park, (rather then falling asleep to a movie on a couch) or not caring about what time it is- or maybe just taking a drive to the beach because I feel like that’s where I belong or my ‘favorite’-meeting a random girl at the park!-and then thinking about how relevant the moment was J …These are the simple things I’ve neglected. Doing this also has helped me process past and present choices I have made, & to truly reflect on what it is I’m feeling (no more distractions) . Being "Subjective" and "Objective- rather then avoiding it by filling this void with unwarranted actions. I think to myself of all the better and more respectible ways of dealing with my problems-rather then brushing it off with a few shots of Yeager, or partyn. I guess I'm trying to understand these waves & the way they carry me up and down on a daily basis …*-*) And I am choosing to do this alone- because the truth is I have never tried to do this alone- or outsite of a relationship. All my friends have been  supportive, thanks Bro's / Ladies...But on this specific problem I feel like I have to be the one who can lift this weight of pain off my chest. As far as using my Iphone-or Facebook, I really don’t have a specific date or specific day that I want to resume using them. Im sure someday 'll be texting my friends all

over again- just not today or anytime soon. 

Upadte-April 16, 2010,

Today I went to a baby shower/ bbq with family and noticed a beautiful cake in the fridge. This cake had two tiers, was brown, and a bunch of ribbons which gave off good coordination of colors. I was really impressed overall- you can tell the baker of this cake put tons of effort and detail into their work. I didn't stay long enough to get a slice- instead I left home early to do some laundry and to turn on my Iphone for the first time in 6 days. I had 17 voicemails, 28 text messages, and 23 facebook updates status. Sorry Grama I missed your calls and no, I won't be home 3 days ago (lol). It was nice actually text messaging again and just hearing from my closest friends. It was a little annoying vindicating myself to certain people but well worth the explanation of what I have learned so far. The truth is, I'm learning theses 4 things in the now- as stated below...I'm debating tonight if I should continue this...

Update April 19, 2011

3 days of having my iphone/facebook back and I value and appreciate how I can simply contact a friend who’s all the way in San Diego or Sacramento J cant and wont forget the little things I’ve learned. Also, the cake I saw was a real experience at a real BBQ that lead me to a reminisce of days and years, a time when I knew a  baker who was more then just a friend...This reminisce of memories also brought me to a moment of weakness and servitude. I went six days of being alone and happy without both items and all it took was a cake to trigger this empathy of mixed emotions. Felt like I had to get back on my Iphone and contact my closest friends to overcome the lonelyness that settled in.  I'm very proud of myself for realizing my mistakes and "whom" and "what" it is I’m fighting. . And here’s the best part & the good news; I am accepting & learning how to be alone- learning how to also accept these terms the way they are and  happy with whom this lonley guy is becoming. :)

Thngs I've learned so Far :)

*My Love isn't an instrumental value or tool, its a intrinsic value and comes freely & naturally :)*

 (Dont Force It or Rush into it)---wait, could be both....lol

**My bestest friends will always have a way to find me-regardless if they cannot call me**

(Rogan, Nick, Johnny - I was suprised that you guys all drove to my place on separate occasions looking for me)

***Day Six of no 'Iphone/ Facebook is not enough time to measure Change***
( I've realized a few things but not enough yet)

****Mario statement Men are not meant to be alone- that's why God create Eve"****
(helped me realize I shouldn’t isolate myself, but do not believe that woman are here to serve against our lonelyness)

*****Running with No Music and hearing myself breath  was different, now with music again I am twice as rejuvenated and eager to run more & more*****
( rocking with em Red hot chili peppers, Rolling Stones, and the Beatles- a little house music too)

******It's not as bad as you think it is- looking at the bigger picture just makes you see how small your problems really are******

*******Drinking alcohol doesn’t suppress my feelings like it does with most Bro's, its an elicit, a key that brings me to a door I’ve been ignoring...I took myself there again, and am no longer going back...*******


*******Learning to Re-event myself and I am definitely loving the results and what I see in the mirrior :)
(not in a conceded way lol)

24hrs=24 days

paddling forward....


awake I am 
as I follow my river 

to a place I dreamed
from an old photo, from this picture

(nonperishable memories of Newport Beach)

My soul, myself and my few names
paddled into the earth's deep blue veins
deep I dived for answers above
only with a key on my side- nurture my love

I closed my eyes 
as I swammed passed the Dep & pressure
Suddenly the current brings hope inside and tell's me
Daniel "lets bury your treasures"...

years 1st poem

fav. Song today

bleakly day

*2*26*11

2 cards full of memories

Not warm, too bleak and unexposed

Two twined as the third is out of synergy

And all three finally see how things broke

26 times of blissful & amative love described as chemistry

All lead to a wishful mountain top of hugs & one unproven entity

11 miles to a lover’s rush that was sent to me

I followed this path and thought very much this was meant to be

Until I followed and followed this love into the middle of a winter freeze

And this cold wind always blows

All that’s left is a beautiful stem- she was the rose

And a road that ends where this love has froze

long time ago...

“Being honest is the Best remedy- even if it meAns losing everything you know- because you know they deserves better then that- better then Lies- better then this- I'm confident- moving on- so long and good bye- dAmm I'm never felt so good by being honest :)” ***Long time ago.....